Green September: week two

See Aiming for a Green September for my aims for this month, and Green September: week one for last week’s report.

“Don’t”s

All on course here — in terms of behaviour at least. I am learning to think of the woman in the office next door as just “Susan”. Although I still rest my eyes gratefully on a woman who walks in front of me, I am less likely to let my gaze follow her.

[update: I have had one or two falls, which I noted at the time in my special Green September, and wrote about in my diary. I am conscious of them, but I don’t know how gruesome I should get on this blog.]

On the other hand I seem to feel this faint but constant undertow of lust. It’s undirected and it’s more a kind of sensual arousal. I don’t feel pent up or craving anything.

One danger area is Twitter. My work account attracts the occasional Chinese or Japanese follower. I always go and check out my new followers. The other day two Chinese tweeps followed me. Both were following some of those “My Favourite Japanese Babes”-type twitter feeds. I did spend longer than was strictly necessary scrolling through these pictures.

That was porn of course, but it’s also about allowing myself to be distracted. Apart from a couple of bad habits, many of my “Don’t”s for September are about distractions.

So, I find myself thinking of all these “Don’t”s as a single “Do”: *do* direct my attention.

“Do”s

I continue to enjoy being in a Christian mindspace, and to be caring toward my wife.

My prize for this week is the image of myself as a directed and attentive being.

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  1. Green September: week three | Luke 7:39

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